Starting Over…Again

Well, tomorrow begins the MFA program for me. I have started over in career choices several times in my life, now. First, I was going to be a lifer in the military. That did not end well after my deployment to the Middle East. Next, I spent 16 years of higher education attempting to become […]

A Year Later, I Am Learning That It Isn’t Bipolar Disorder

I am now on a combination of medications that is a hybrid amidst the symptoms of major depression, bipolar depression, and PTSD. And I don’t believe I have Bipolar 1 Disorder with Psychosis. It was likely a bad medication reaction and subsequent rapid overhaul of my medications that set that whole “event” off. Nothing in […]

Caught in the Throes of Grief

Grief. It sucks, let me tell you. My psychiatrist/therapist is retiring. I have to be honest with you—I’m scared. I’m terrified of this change. I just got all of my meds straightened out. I don’t want some new doctor who doesn’t know me to overhaul what’s not broken. I’m afraid. I’m not new to the […]

Falling Off the Cliff…Bipolar Depression

In the last week, I have written two short stories, one titled “BODY” and the other titled “WALLS,” both of which were written out of a sense of needing to get ideas about mental illness across. I have now fallen off the cliff into Bipolar Depression, which is no joke. I need to write a […]

“BODY”

I wrote an entire short story in four hours this afternoon. The title is “BODY” and it is about a civil war between the brain and the rest of the organs inside this fellow’s body. I will let your imaginations run wild with that. The reason that I’m excited is that I haven’t had a […]

A Writer with Bipolar Disorder

It really doesn’t matter what your profession is when you have Bipolar Disorder. When people find out, if they find out, they will undoubtedly say and do things that are unfair, hurtful, and just downright offensive to, about, and around you. There are plenty of people who are very successful who are—yes—suffering from Bipolar Disorder. […]

Learn the Rules to Break Them

I have always enjoyed writing. There were always things taking away my ideas and reasons not to be creative in school, though. “Format the paper this way,” one teacher would say, and another, “I didn’t ask what you think.” Soon, my child-like sense of the world was gone, and in its place, stood a monolithic […]

Two Terms Down at SNHU

I just finished my second term at SNHU. I got 1000/1000 points. Yes, that’s an A. A very solid and hard-earned A. I learned a lot during this last class, but with the Bipolar mania going on, I was not sure how it was going to turn out for a little while there. Mania is […]

Bipolar 1 Disorder with Psychosis

As of 21 October 2020, this diagnosis—Bipolar 1 Disorder with Psychosis—is a reality in my life. Prior to that point in my life, the totality of my mental identity was neatly summarized as Chronic Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) with Anxiety and Depression. That came straight from my military discharge orders. Yes, I still have that […]